Totweet Towho?!

Twitter good or bad? The Guide to Everything

142 Communication/Social Networking/Is Twitter good or bad?

September 27th, 2010

As regular readers will know, we believe there is no such thing as good or bad, it is only thinking that makes it so.

So Twitter is bad if it involves your menopausal Aunty Brenda tweeting about here collapsing plumbing but good if you are part of an amusing network of comedians trying to craft a joke. Bad if Grandad Basil takes the full 140 characters to describe his collection of parsnips, and then tweets another 140 to reinforce his previous musings and so on until your 350 requests per hour API limit is reached and you miss that offer of Fellatio Nelson from the naughty tickle sort you met the night before.

The best tweet ever received by these authors was ‘

If someone cannot get their message across in a Tweet in one hundred and forty characters or less then they are without doubt a complete cun’

The worst was ‘The parsnip (Pastinaca sativa) is a root vegetable related to the carrot. Parsnips resemble carrots, but are paler than most carrots and hav’. Closely followed by ‘e a stronger flavor. Like carrots, parsnips are native to Eurasia and have been eaten there since ancient times. Zohary and Hopf note that t’

“So what about Facebook? What do you wise Gurus of Everything think about Facebook?’ In a word ‘Gash’. In more than a word ‘complete utter gash’.

Farcebook is the devil’s work (see 666 Satan Spawn/Dripping Rancid Hot Vile Pungent Syphilitic Beelzebub Smegma/Facebook)

“But what about the ability to show pictures to all my friends and family?” What about Farmville, you moron?

“But what about keeping in touch with everyone you care about” Kill yourself you demented prick.

Twitter is Angel Cake and Farcebook is Battenburg (seehttp://www.cultcomedy.net/comedy-2/8-foodcakesthe-battenburg). Like battenburg it should be banned. 

Zohary and Hopf’s seminal work, so much better than Farcebook.